Lonely Stars

Walking back from the campus center tonight I found myself starring at the sky. The nighttime sky is so vast and it makes me wonder if somewhere out there my other half is looking too. Is that possible? In a world of six billion people, is there someone designed for me just waiting out there. Does everyone have another half? Every time I look at the sky the vision of me laying in the grass cuddled into him, over takes my senses. I find it funny that in a world so big I can feel so lonely. That thought alone makes me worried, if I'm lonely here, won't I be just as lonely if not more so in NYC? Someone today told me that I should try to live more in the present than worry about the past and the future. Prehaps this is just me living in the present. I'm lonely. I'm not thinking about who I've been with and who I want to be with in the future. I'm lonely. Ah! I should sleep 8am classes never treat me well and I have to make up ballet classes I missed. Bahumbug.

Cup Size Rant

Why do men evaluate women on their breast size? Excuse me, not all of us can afford nor wish to have huge breasts. The size of a bra cup has no relation to the beauty of my face or character. Screw you and your asshole ways. Yes, I may or may not have had a few drinks when coming to this conclusion, but completely sober it's still true. I may not have the biggest breast in the room, but I'd like to believe that I'm beautiful young woman. Fuck you and you and you. You're all the same. I'm sure if I stuck my tits out more you'd enjoy the view better...well guess what! I have diginity and standards so sorry I won't do that. And you may argue that we have some sort of history, yeah well guess what!?! The reason I got all dolled up tonight wasn't for you! It was for myself and if you happened to enjoy the way I was looking then you SHOULD have said it to my FACE. Communication is the basis to every friendship and sexual relationship. Done waiting, done caring, done with you. Done. Done. Done. I realize when I wake up from this early morning mind set, I'll chalk up a dozen reasons to give you another chance. And sadly you'll always have a second chance in my book and you'll always be that one in the back of mind. I don't know what I did to deserve you or lose you, but karma's a fucking bitch. One day I'll be with a man who loves every flaw and every line of my body. We'll be in bliss and it won't have been with you. So sorry this 34 B isn't as "attractive" as your 36 D, but you can suck my vagina.

Rainy, Rainy Days

Today was a rainy day of thoughts, thoughts, and more thoughts. Thoughts about all the drama of my college, of ex friends, dreams, and my film survey project. Film Survey..."create your own dance film". Oh, okay. I'm actually quite excited for this project, the idea has really been developing. My group and I have decided that our film is going along the lines of Maya Deren. Hopefully everything goes well and the project comes out great. I think it shall. I have also recently decided that I shall enroll in a photography class this summer, so I can have a side job taking headshots and dance photos for people, since I already do it for free for friends. Ideally I'd love to enroll in Film School once I move to NYC, but we shall see only 4 weeks left of the semester.

also is " (RAH)² (AH)³ + [ROMA (1+MA)] + (GA)² + (OOH)(LA)² " tattoo material?